Today’s menu consists of two choices: Take it or Leave it


Summer , I always loved summer !! When I was in school it meant the beginning of summer vacation.  Going to Grandma’s and getting spoiled to the point that I should have been sent directly to one of those camps that Dr. Phil sends his adolescent guest to when all else has failed that or either the kid has scared the shit of some poor mother sitting there on stage, you know the one I am talking about, with the mother that you want to just yell” get a backbone cause it’s “whopping time”. Sitting on stage is some 15 yr old with a attitude that makes most of us wanna get the belt out for this poor mousey mom ( Ok times have changed and all teenagers know how to dial 911) . What they really needed was a good kick in the ass. I could be talking about myself here , so lets get back to summer.  Amsterdam is not always very hot. 31- c or 86- f for those of you back in the states. I then  pulled myself up and after some thought , I struggled into my swim suit . Struggle is the key word here. But after everything was shaved and  tucked in, and regardless of the fact that I was wrapped like a damn mermaid with a past due expiration date. I took one last look in the mirror, mind you it was a quick look , feeling somewhat satisfied  and overlooking the fact that my swimsuit was clearly 2 sizes too small. I took a deep breath and off I went . Maybe I should have mention that,  now that the summer is close to an end , about a week ago I finally got off the sofa and found some magic determination to try to lose some weight . Here I am thinking that I have been riding my bike every day ( a week at best), so surely I have lost some weight. That is why the look in the mirror was for a blind microsecond,  I wasn’t about to burst my own bubble now . Riding to the park and looking forward to my swim. I felt good, in fact damn proud that I have kept up the progress for a full week without falter. Smile in hand and sweat  pouring off me in waves, at some point , I did wonder if I really needed to bother with the swim. But doing my best to have stamina, I pushed on.  This being the day hottest that I have ever seen in the 14 yrs that I have lived here. I was overcome with emotions mostly about my ongoing mid-life crisis, bipolar, addiction and recovery. Pushing away the thoughts that normally have me swimming, I mean drowning  in a bottle of vodka,  . Pushing on , my legs hurt, I am out of breath but , I have reached the lovely lake. Looking around trying to check the place the out , hoping that I don’t look insane in my betty boop suit I am over run by a group  serious bikers, the kind that you see on the tour de France, I am shaken and fucking pissed as these ladies must have been at least 70 yrs old. Not one of them were huffing and puffing as I was . And what am I doing ? Having a vodka bitter lemon flashback, all while mentally thinking “ next summer” 

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3 responses to “Today’s menu consists of two choices: Take it or Leave it

  1. how are you doing gurly girl? At least you can tuck yourself into a swim suit still lol and make it all the way to the lake for crying out loud lol. I can barely squeeze one of my pairs of jeans on and a bike? lol forget it. At least you are working on it and that is great! You are doing a lot better than most of us. Forget those old ladies, they’re probably on steriods anyway lol 😉


  2. Pingback: Today’s menu consists of two choices: Take it or Leave it | Miss Crabby Ass

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